About this web page
In my early 20s, I was a sceptical atheist. Then my awareness of life and my total being was changed by an insight into the nature
of reality. On entering my room I saw a column of golden light and fell to my knees. For me it was an experience that was transformative, but without president.
Although the light appeared to me to be external, it may well have been internal -- as God is both within and without all things. God is ever present, but unseen by man, except as in symbolic form, or energy.
This comprehension of Divinity was an act of grace. It gave me a sense of knowing that everything is all right and I was filled with feelings of transcendent joy. This ecstatic state lasted about three weeks. Then I fell away into despair.
It was beyond my knowledge how to integrate this experience. What action was I to take with my life and thoughts. What to Do? I tried to talk with different people, I even tried the local church, but I had lost what had been given.
Unable to reconcile the paradox of despair and the ecstatic, I pretended that the event never happened and that my life had not changed. That transcendence was a myth. My thoughts and life then seemed futile, even hopeless. I only saw misery and pain in the world and the sorrow of human existence. I was confronted by my old beliefs about the desolation of life. Yet beauty and joy was still there, but I did not see it.
But when an event as important as this occurs things become different, a person cannot fit back into a state of dull ambition and meaningless pastimes. Alcohol is spirit, but not a path to spirituality. Four months after the event, I left England for Canada to start life anew. In Canada, I hoped that the change of venue would bring a clearer understanding and a sense of perspective so that I could create a life of meaning and purpose.
The last 50 years have been a journey to reconcile inner and outer experiences, and so to find a true reality. My faith was semi-hidden by my ignorant beliefs and fears, but it was always ready to guide me, nevertheless.
During this time, I studied many theories and beliefs and practised different modalities such as "Radionic’s," Reiki and "Spiritual response therapy." I also encountered many false trails and mumbo jumbo and believed foolish things. All human beliefs are subject to change. Including, all religious, scientific, medical and ontological beliefs.
Eventually I formed my current understanding of life, an understanding which I constantly endeavour to update, as both myself and the world change.
With an open heart and mind we can connect to our inner clarity and free ourselves from illusion. The eternal reality of God is an integral part of our being and Divine knowing is available to us. But we must be ready, then take action.
Although the light appeared to me to be external, it may well have been internal -- as God is both within and without all things. God is ever present, but unseen by man, except as in symbolic form, or energy.
This comprehension of Divinity was an act of grace. It gave me a sense of knowing that everything is all right and I was filled with feelings of transcendent joy. This ecstatic state lasted about three weeks. Then I fell away into despair.
It was beyond my knowledge how to integrate this experience. What action was I to take with my life and thoughts. What to Do? I tried to talk with different people, I even tried the local church, but I had lost what had been given.
Unable to reconcile the paradox of despair and the ecstatic, I pretended that the event never happened and that my life had not changed. That transcendence was a myth. My thoughts and life then seemed futile, even hopeless. I only saw misery and pain in the world and the sorrow of human existence. I was confronted by my old beliefs about the desolation of life. Yet beauty and joy was still there, but I did not see it.
But when an event as important as this occurs things become different, a person cannot fit back into a state of dull ambition and meaningless pastimes. Alcohol is spirit, but not a path to spirituality. Four months after the event, I left England for Canada to start life anew. In Canada, I hoped that the change of venue would bring a clearer understanding and a sense of perspective so that I could create a life of meaning and purpose.
The last 50 years have been a journey to reconcile inner and outer experiences, and so to find a true reality. My faith was semi-hidden by my ignorant beliefs and fears, but it was always ready to guide me, nevertheless.
During this time, I studied many theories and beliefs and practised different modalities such as "Radionic’s," Reiki and "Spiritual response therapy." I also encountered many false trails and mumbo jumbo and believed foolish things. All human beliefs are subject to change. Including, all religious, scientific, medical and ontological beliefs.
Eventually I formed my current understanding of life, an understanding which I constantly endeavour to update, as both myself and the world change.
With an open heart and mind we can connect to our inner clarity and free ourselves from illusion. The eternal reality of God is an integral part of our being and Divine knowing is available to us. But we must be ready, then take action.
